I never fully understood them. They often missunderstood me. So, trying to bcome a better understood/understanding man, I searched for some help. Here is what I came across:~): [bold]WORDS WOMEN USE[/bold] ****************** [bold]FINE[/bold] This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks - this will cause you to have one of those arguments. [bold]FIVE MINUTES[/bold] This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade. [bold]NOTHING[/bold] This means "something," and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with "Fine" [bold]GO AHEAD[/bold] (With Raised Eyebrows! ) This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine" [bold]GO AHEAD[/bold] (Normal Eyebrows) This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care". You will get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off. [bold]LOUD SIGH[/bold] This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing" [bold]SOFT SIGH[/bold] Again, not a word, but a non-verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content. [bold]THAT'S OKAY[/bold] This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a "Raised Eyebrow." [bold]GO AHEAD![/bold] At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble. [bold]PLEASE DO[/bold] This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay" [bold]THANKS[/bold] A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say you're welcome:~)!. [bold]THANKS A LOT[/bold] This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Nothing" If anyone finds something in the code that needs to be updated or add something, feel free to do that!
...LOL! I hear you. Sometimes, you get everything thrown at you.That's when I take the garbage out and I come back an hour later:~)!
NEVERMIND----Don't say anything more, her mind is already made up and nothing you could possibly say will change it. Usually followed by the LOUD SIGH.
Cyprusrom my friend understanding the fairer gender has been our quest since the beginning of time and we still haven't gotten a grasp on it and probably never will so don't be too hard on yourself. Now might I suggest you find a guide for mind reading, coz this could be of greatest benefit to you in your pursuit.
time to put a smile on ye face.. A MAN'S TALE OF WOE Now my wife just left and the well went dry, and my horse is sick and about to die. Then my still blew up and the barn burned down, and the road washed out on the way to town. Then my dog got rabies and bit the cat, and they both died soon after that. Now I lost my specs and my pipe stem broke, so I can't even sit and read and smoke. Then a tree fell on the chicken shed, and most of the hens got smashed plumb dead. Then a chimney fire took half of a wall, and this old shack is about to fall. Then I caught my heel on an old dead vine, and sat smack dab on a porcupine. Then a beaver dam broke and my bridge washed out and my watch stopped working and I've got the gout. And the bank foreclosed so I've lost my place, and my cows disappeared without a trace. They cut off my credit at the grocery store, and I lost my job and a whole lot more. I must have been hexed by a triple curse, as things keep going from bad to worse. And now fate has hit me a last dirty crack; to top of the worst - my wife's coming back.
@Irelad Poor bastard! What else could go wrong for him! @jamzbond I was thinking at mind reading training, but I thought I'd start with smething easier, like verbal clues:~)!
A woman is driving on the road & A man is driving in the opposite direction, on that same road & When they pass each other, the woman rolls down her window and shouts - HORSE Immediately the man shouts back - Bitch ! The man laughs because he is happy to have reacted so quickly to the shouting woman, and takes the turn in the road with high speed. The moral: Men never understand what women say
