Have you added the latest SYSTEM folder, if not go here http://gbatemp.net/index.php?showtopic=89197&st=0&start=0 Get this and transfer the complete folder to the micro SD. If you already have a system folder, make sure you do not have a fake the web address on the card and box should be www.m3adapter.com, not adaptese or anything else.
i have a similar problem. I bought 2 m3 dsreal cards for my kids ds. they both have same ds model. I was able to get both real cards to play on white ds. the red ds shows no card inserted. any ideas as to why they both play on the white ds and not the red. I did use the same card reader to download games because the other card reader showed it was damaged on my computer. I don't know if this would cause any problems.