south park Mr. Garrison: I just don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die. Mr. Garrison: Okay, children. Let's all gather around and bob for stupid apples now. You go first, Bebe. That's good. Just use those mouth muscles like the girls in Beijing. Mr. Garrison: Who was in charge of the feminist movement of the early '60's? Cartman: A bunch of fat old skanks on their periods. Mr. Garrison: Right. But who was the fattest, oldest skank on her period? Mr. Garrison: No, that's wrong, Cartman. But don't worry. There are no stupid answers, just stupid people. Mr. Garrison: Let's all clear the air. We all know that pigeon was a whore. Raise your hand if you didn't sleep with that pigeon. Philip: This is worse than the time I fell asleep with your dick in my mouth and took a picture. Terrance: I know, Philip, I know. Stan: Dude, dolphins are intelligent and friendly. Cartman: Intelligent and friendly on rye bread with some mayonnaise. Stan: One day you're gonna have to stop running and deal with what happened. Otherwise, you might as well just move to France with all the other pussies.
Mr. Garrison: ERIC CARTMAN, how would you like to go down to the principal's office? Cartman: How would you like to suck my balls? Mr. Garrison: What did you say to me? Cartman: Oh, I'm sorry, excuse me, what I said was <Pulls out megaphone> HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO SUCK MY BALLS, Mr. Garrison?
south park Kindergartener #1: This looks too tough. We're going to play Harry Potter with the other kids. Kindergartener #2: Me too. Cartman: Fine. Go on and play 'Harry Butthole puppy Potter.' Uncle Jimbo: So you see, we have to kill animals, or else they'll die. Choir Teacher: Well, that about does it. If you have any questions, I'll leave information packets up front. Cartman: Oh that's good, we need some more toilet paper.
seeing everyone said just about every line from my favourite movie "jay & silent bob strike back" > heres my favourite line from 'white chicks':. "once you go black your gonna need a wheelchair" & also from 'shaun of the dead':. "can i get any of you *unts a drink?" last one, from 'full metal jacket':. drill instructor:. well what do we have here? WTF is this? WTF is this Pyle? gomer pyle:. a jelly donut sir drill instructor:. a jelly fu*ken donut, are you allowed to have jelly donuts pyle? gomer pyle:. sir no sir drill instructor:. and why is that private pyle? gomer pyle:. cause im top heavy sir drill instructor:. yes, because you are a disgusting fat body pyle.
Team America Guy in Bar: See, there's three kinds of people: dicks, pussies, and assholes. Pussies think everyone can get along, and dicks just want to fu*k all the time without thinking it through. But then you got your assholes, Chuck. And all the assholes want us to shit all over everything! So, pussies may get mad at dicks once in a while, because pussies get fu*ked by dicks. But dicks also fusk assholes, Chuck. And if they didn't fusk the assholes, you know what you'd get? You'd get your dick and your puppy all covered in shit! Spottswoode: Remember, there is no "I" in "Team America". Intelligence: [pause] Yes there is. Sean Penn: Last year I went to Iraq. Before Team America showed up, it was a happy place. They had flowering meadows and rainbow skies, and rivers made of chocolate, where the children danced and laughed and played with gumdrop smiles. Spottswoode: Gary is the kind of man that understands, when you put another man's cock in your mouth, you make a pact.
The South Park where they were doing the You Got Served thing and when the guy started singin "You do a line and I'll do a line baby." That shit was hilarious! The one where Cartman's hand was Jennifer Lopez was kinda disturbing. You know, when he started giving Ben AFLAC a hand job.
I saw little excerpts about it when they did a look on Trey and Matt, because of the success with South Park and the release of Team America: World Police.
damn need some better movies in here [bold]Snatch[/bold] Vinny: What do you mean, Replicas? Sol: They look the shit, don't they? And no one is going to argue. I've got some extra loud blanks just in case. Vinny: Oh, in case we have to deafen them to death? Vinny: Why are we stopped here? What's wrong with that spot? Tyrone: It's too tight. Vinny: Too tight? You could land a jumbo fusking jet in that. Bullet Tooth Tony: I'm driving down the road with your head stuck in my window. What does it look like I'm doin'? Sol: You ain't from this planet are you, Vincent? Who is gonna mug two black fellas, holding pistols, sat in a car that is worth less than your shirt? [bold]Reservoir Dogs:[/bold] mr white: shit, you shoot me in a dream, you better wake up and apologize. [bold]Pulp Fiction:[/bold] the wolf: that's thirty minutes away. ill be there in ten. [bold]Good Will Hunting[/bold] you're legally allowed to drink now so we thought the best thing for you was a car. [bold]Goodfellas[/bold] devito: im funny how? funny like a clown, do i assume you? do i make you laugh? im here to fusking assume you? [bold]Poolhall Junkies[/bold] Max: Man that chick has got body karate. Tang: Hay do you think her tits are real? I hate chicks with fake tits. Max: Are you kidding me? Fake tits are the greatest invention of the 20th century. Plus their safe. Chris: Woe woe woe, safer? Max: Yah! But Da you know that 78% of all chicks that have fake tits involved in boating accidents do not drown. Danny Doyle: Where do you get this shit? Max: It's common knowledge and Max: Did you guys know, that the average penis size is 6.4 inches? And that the average vaginal canal is 7.9 inches.Therefore, in this country alone, there's over 17,000 miles of unused, virgin puppy out there. [bold]Fast Times at Ridgemont High[/bold] mike damone: i woke up in a great mood, dont knwo what the hell happened. [bold]12 Monkeys[/bold] Jeffrey Goines: There's no right, there's no wrong, there's only popular opinion. Jeffrey Goines: Telephone call? Telephone call? That's communication with the outside world. Doctor's *discretion*. Nuh-uh. Look, hey - all of these nuts could just make phone calls, they could spread insanity, oozing through telephone cables, oozing into the ears of all these poor sane people, infecting them. Wackos everywhere, plague of madness. James Cole: Look at them. They're just asking for it. Maybe the human race deserves to be wiped out. Jeffrey Goines: Wiping out the human race? That's a great idea. That's great. But more of a long-term thing. I mean, first we have to focus on more immediate goals. ok almost every line from brad pitt is a good one, watch it [bold]American History X[/bold] danny: hate is baggage, lifes to short to be pissed off all the time inmate: im the most dangerous man in this prison, you know why? cause i control the underwear. to many more to list
[bold]Any Given Sunday[/bold] Tony D'Amato: If you're gonna be a loser, raise your hand. IF you're gonna act like a puppy, raise your hand. [Julian Washington stands up and raises his hand] Tony D'Amato: What the hell are you doing, J? Julian Washington: Well, I didn't want you to be the only puppy with your hand up, so I thought I'd help you out. [bold]Animal House[/bold] Katy: Boon, I think I'm in love with a retard. Boon: Is he bigger than me? Babs: Greg, honey, is it supposed to be this soft? ^a great one Boon: Now, she should be good-looking, but we're willing to trade looks for a certain... morally casual attitude. Bluto: Christ. Seven years of college down the drain. Might as well join the fusking Peace Corps. another movie with tons of great ones, watch it [bold]Ferris Buellers Day Off[/bold] Ed Rooney: What's the score? Pizza Joint Owner: Nothin' nothin'. Ed Rooney: Who's winning? Pizza Joint Owner: The Bears. Ferris: If you're not over here in fifteen minutes, you can find a new best friend. Cameron: You've been saying that since the fifth grade. Economics Teacher: Bueller? Bueller? Bueller? Simone: Um, he's sick. My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with the girl who saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavors last night. I guess it's pretty serious. Economics Teacher: Thank you, Simone Simone: No problem whatsoever. who hasnt said that, someones name over and over imitating this [bold]The New Guy[/bold] Luther: High school is a lot like prison: Bad food, high fences; the sex you want, you ain't gettin', the sex you gettin', you don't want. I've seen terrible things. Dizzy: Yesterday, an eighty-year-old librarian broke my penis. Luther: You win. [bold]The hunt for Red October[/bold] Capt. Bart Mancuso: My Morse is so rusty, I could be sending him dimensions on playmate of the month. Jeffrey Pelt: Listen, I'm a politician which means I'm a cheat and a liar, and when I'm not kissing babies I'm stealing their lollipops. But it also means I keep my options open. ^^is that the exact definition there? [bold]The Life of David Gale[/bold] Zack: 73% of all serial killers vote Republican [bold]Road to Perdition[/bold] John Rooney: Natural law. Sons are put on this earth to trouble their fathers. [bold]Roger Dodger[/bold] to his 16 year old nephew in a bar.. Roger: You drink that drink! Alcohol has been a social lubricant for thousands of years. What do you think, you're going to sit here tonight and reinvent the wheel? [bold]The Usual Suspects[/bold] Verbal: Who is Keyser Soze? He is supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Soze. You never knew. That was his power. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. [bold]Better off Dead[/bold] Charles De Mar: This is pure snow! Do you have any idea what the street value of this mountain is? paper boy: WHERES MY TWO DOLLARS!!! [bold]The Sure Thing[/bold] Gib: You told her I was a virgin? Lance: Women love a challenge... Gib: You told her I was gay! Lance: It's a bigger challenge. [bold]Tao of Steve[/bold] Syd: What do you look for in a woman? Dex: Uh,... Low Standards. Syd: So, you smoke pot for breakfast, you work part time, and you ... Dex: ... have limited potential. Dex: Doing stuff is overrated. Like Hitler. He did a lot. But don't we all wish he woulda just stayed home and gotten stoned? Dex: You think all Buddhist monks are like the Dalai Lama? I mean, you don't there are guys in Nepal, right, who are like, "What should I do? Should I carry packs of heavy shit for Westerners up to the top of the base camp on Mt. Everest, or should I stay down here in Katmandu and maybe just chant all day and check out chicks and pretend to be holy?" [bold]United States of Leland[/bold] Pearl Madison: I'm only human. Leland: How come people only say that when they've done something wrong? [bold]City of God[/bold] - awesome movie Zé Pequeno: Can you read? Gang Member: I can read only the pictures. [bold]Finding Forrester[/bold] Forrester: In some cultures it's good luck to be wearing something inside-out. Jamal: And you believe that? Forrester: No, but it's like praying: what do you risk? Jamal: That's not exactly a soup question, now is it? alright sorry but i love quotes, i will stop to leave some for everyone else
Slackers Jeff: Yoo-hoo, it's Steve Pasternack, looking for Angela! Angela, please! Reanna: Do I fu*king know you? Jeff: Uh, I lent Angela my notebook, because I take such world "famous" notes. So I was wondering if I could... are you busy with something? Reanna: Yeah. I was masturbating. Jeff: Heh. Hoo! Masturbating. In the dorms. Well, that's what you get when you go to art school. Mr. Leonard: Good afternoon Mr. Dulles. Dave: Call me Jack. Mr. Leonard: But is says here your first name is Ethan? Dave: Nah, just call me Jack. Mr. Leonard: All right Jack. If you could describe yourself in one word, what would it be? Dave: Hmmm, I'd have to say... slave to the freaky ass booty Angela: Ethan, what is this, is this a hair doll? Ethan: I didn't make that! It fell out of your hair that way! Ethan: The dirty old whore told me to do it! Scary Movie 2 Cindy Campbell: Someone help. My puppy's gone crazy. Father McFeely: How is she? Mrs. Voorhees: It's gotten worse Father. She won't eat. She won't talk to me. The child won't let me touch her. Father McFeely: Yes, sometimes you have to give them candy, first. Father McFeely: Hi, I'm Father McFeely. Mrs. Voorhees: Yes, I'm so glad you're here. Father McFeely: I came as fast as I could. But you know at my age the little soldier needs a lot more thumpin' before it starts pumpin'.
/quote Roger Dodger to his 16 year old nephew in a bar.. Roger: You drink that drink! Alcohol has been a social lubricant for thousands of years. What do you think, you're going to sit here tonight and reinvent the wheel? men you saw that movie to god this is onbe o my favortie movies god this ones is good.
i'm new here but got some pretty good to [/bold]Chasing amy [/bold]holden: every second I live, I know there's not another f*cking soul on this planet that I want more [/bold]alyssa: what that's so unfair. [/bold]holden: unfair???? it's unfair i'm in love with you. [/bold]alyssa: no that is unfortunate, what's so unfair is that you have to lighten your soul from that. you know what...... i'm gay, i'm f*cking gay holden [/bold]fight club [/bold]tyler: i like more autodestruction [/bold]matrix: welcome to the white rabbit hole [/bold]forrest gump: life is like a box of chocolate [/bold]zoolander: even if models have beautiful beautiful bodies, it doesn't mean that they can't die in a stupid gaz war accident. [/bold]nappoleon dynnamite: (plugging the "time machine" and getting shocked) [/bold]napoleon: this stupid piece of crap doesn't even work. [/bold]high fidelity ...... too much to say [/bold]rounders: life's just like a game of poker.... you HAVE to know when to throw in your cards [/bold]roger dodger: (yelling) HE'S NOT DADDY.... HE'S JUST A GUY IN A SUIT. [/bold]roger dodger [/bold]nick: so what are you doin for livin'. [/bold]roger: basicly i sit here all day to think of way to make people feel awful about themself. [/bold]nick: ooooh i tought you were in publicity [/bold]austin powers [/bold]austin: come and sit .... the bed won't ...... bite [/bold]familly guy (cartoons not the movie) [/bold]vallet: sorry sir you can't park your van on the divving board [/bold]peter: hey! its not my van its my son [/bold]vallet: oh sorry sir. hey tom! it's not a van its just a fat kid and so on so on
"FEAR AND LOATHING IN LAS VEGAS" When Jonny depp is high of LSD: -----> Just ignore this terrible drug! <-----
Stealing Harvard Duff: We should make up some fake names. John: Why? Duff: Just in case we have to communicate while we're inside. John: OK. Duff: I wanna be Kyle. I knew this guy at camp. He was maybe 13. He got *two* girls pregnant, man. *Two* girls pregnant. Yea, Kyle. Who you gonna be? John: Steve... Duff: Steve. John: Yeah. Duff: OK, Steve. John: OK, Kyle. [John and Duff continue walking] Duff: Wait. John: What? Duff: I wanna change. I wanna be Steve. John: I'm Steve; You're Karl. Duff: Kyle! John's Grandmother: Who do you think I am, Albert fuckin' Trump? Duff: I wanted to scope the place out. I was hungry so I decided to heat up a brick of cheese. I need my cheese. Mr. Warner: Have you slept with my daughter? John: Mr. Warner, I have never slept with Elaine. Mr. Warner: Good! Godammit, that's good! Because if you had, John, I was gonna kick your balls up into your head and let them rattle around in your skull like dice in a Yahtzee cup. Have a good one!
We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold. -From the Book and Movie "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" by the late great Hunter S. Thompson
