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GrandpaBW: its friday funnies

Discussion in 'Safety valve' started by andmerr, Oct 8, 2004.

  1. Lethal_B

    Lethal_B Moderator Staff Member

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    What do you give a pig with a sore nose?



























    ..oinkment
     
  2. ddp

    ddp Moderator Staff Member

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    that joke was lethal.
     
  3. GrandpaBW

    GrandpaBW Active member

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    Little Johnny And Definite Definition


    The preschool teacher says, "We're going to do vocabulary today. Who can use the word 'definitely' in a sentence?"

    Mary raises her hand and exclaims, "Me me me!"

    The teacher says, "Go ahead, what's the sentence?

    Mary replies, "The sky is definitely blue."

    "That's good, Mary," says the teacher, "but the sky can also be gray or white."

    Sam raises his hand and states, "Grass is definitely green."

    The teacher says, "That's good, Sam, but grass can be brown, too."

    Little Johnny raises his hand and asks, "Do farts have lumps in them?"

    The teacher says, "No Johnny, why do you ask that?"

    Little Johnny replies, "Well then, I definitely sh*t my pants."
     
  4. ddp

    ddp Moderator Staff Member

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    that was a good 1. poor little johnny, always getting into trouble when not looking for it.
     
  5. garmoon

    garmoon Regular member

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    @ddp and grandpa

    Glad to see you both still alive as I am. we're getting up there grandpa. Love the jokes.
    Crazy paula still dropping in? Hi also
     
  6. GrandpaBW

    GrandpaBW Active member

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    It's good to see that you are still kicking too, Garmoon!
     
  7. kermitcola

    kermitcola Newbie

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    Little Johnny was doing his maths homework. He says out loud, "One plus six, that son of a bitch is seven. Four plus four, that son of a bitch is eight."

    His mum overhears this and is shocked! she says to him, "What are you doing Johnny?"

    Johnny replies, "I am just doing my maths homework."

    " And is this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother asks. "Yes," Johnny replies.

    The mother is now angry and immediately phones Johnny's teacher, "What on earth are you teaching my son in class?" she asks.

    The teacher replies, "Right now, we are learning mathematical addition."

    The mother asks, "And are you teaching them to say one plus six, that son of a bitch is seven?"

    After the teacher stopped laughing hysterically, she answers, "What I taught them to say was, one plus six, the sum of which is seven."
     

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