Where Did All The Old Timers Go, A Public Meeting Place For Open Discussion

Howdy Rav! Still afternoon here though ... waiting for this damned office to close so I can go home!

 

Hi Gerry :-D

Lol, it's my time off since last week and I bloody well needed it...nice sig BTW.

 

Evenin' all.

Edit: Good night all, off to bed now!

 

Hello ALL, especially to Lethal_B, who's probably still getting over the Ashes defeat!!!

 

I found a pic of ireland waitin for the mornin cup o java!! Oh! and something about spreading joy and cheer. lol. Well at least something in PINK will do!!! Thanks for the reminder to breath after the post of the pink go-faster car.

 

Good morning all. I have a hell of a cold but came to the office anyway as, with so many on vacation, we've only got a couple of people here today...wasn't that nice of me? First thing I did was cancel my appointments though; I can't seem to think straight ... a real struggle for me under even the best of circumstances.

 

good morning all

some of the noobs here should read this

Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared."
Operator: "Hmm So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
Caller: "What's a monitor?"
Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
Caller: "I don't know."
Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
Caller: "Yes, I think so."
Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: "Yes, it is."
Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
Caller: "Okay, here it is."
Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Caller: "I can't reach."
Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"
Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."
Operator: "Dark??"
Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
" Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
Caller: "I can't."
Operator: "No? Why not??"
Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
Operator: "A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??"
Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
Operator: "Tell them you're too f$*%ing stupid to own a computer!!!!!"

 

That made my day Ireland, very good!

 

@Ireland...LMAO! I resent the whole story though....sounds too much like me spending three days trying to earase non rewritable dvd's LOL! ...and I actually did return the computer because it wouldn't do it LOL!

 

/me slaps some sense into Gerry! LOL! 3 days? You must be very patient, I would have torn my hair out if I was you! ;-)

 

this is for gerry1,theres hope for ye,when ye get old

I Must ConfessAn

elderly man goes into confession and says to the priest, 'Father, I'm 80 years old, married, have four kids and 11 grandchildren. Last night I had an affair and made love to two 18-year-old girls. Both of them. Twice.'
The priest said: 'Well, my son, when was the last time you were in confession?'

'Never Father, I'm Jewish.'

'So then, why are you telling me?'

'I'm telling everybody.'


French Horn

'Say,' began Lucille one day over lunch, 'didn't you go out with that guy who played the French horn?'

'Yeah,' said Diane, stirring her iced tea.

'You were really looking forward to it, I remember. How'd it go?' Lucille leaned forward eagerly.

'Actually he was a pretty nice guy,' volunteered Diane reluctantly. 'But there was one real problem . . .'

'Oh, really?'

'Every time he kissed me, he wanted to shove his fist up my arse.'

 

ireland,
ye is a dirty ladd!!!

Evening to all!!


.............c

 

good morning to ye all,i is here is ye?
i is all set for christmas..i got me bottle..

 

@ Ireland with the naughty jokes et al ... I is here but not for long. Would you believe I'm going to fill in for the receptionist? THis should be something!

 

gerry1,
i can vision ye now...



OR

 

@Ireland...I don't belive I agreed to do it. They let most of the staff go early but the office has to stay open normal hours and she wanted go too but there was no one to take her place so I agreed. I don't really have the patience for that sort of work and I drew the line at answering phones. The system is on auto.

 

No! I'm going to be stubborn and rude, so nah!

Hehe

Evenin' people.